


Somebody That I Used To Know

by darkangel_silvermoon



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Big Ball of Angst, M/M, Masturbation, Pre-Slash, Smut, is that a thing anymore...pre-slash?, smut at the end, sperek - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-21 01:02:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 7,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9524414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkangel_silvermoon/pseuds/darkangel_silvermoon
Summary: Maybe there's another Derek? That could explain why his name is on Spencer's lips. (Or that one time Derek Morgan caught Spencer Reid getting his rocks off in the hotel shower)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There is not enough fic of these two. An update to my old fic on ff.net. I own nothing. I miss these two darlings on the screen together.  
> There will be smut. There will be angst. Let me know what you think. It'd be greatly appreciated. :)

Spencer's eyes close against the heated spray of the shower, droplets clinging to the ends of his hair as steam swirls around his head.

He continues to work the tip of his cock, hand slick with lube, froth forming from the trace of soap and precum as he pumps his fist up and down. Delicious shivers rake down his spine. 

He bites his lips, failing to hold back the choked moans trying to spill. Images float past his closed lids, things he shouldn't want--mocha skin and washboard abs, gentle caresses, soft eyes.

"More…" Reid whispers. The water sounds thunderous as it splashes off the tiled wall of the hotel's shower. 

His chest rises and falls; he scrapes the blunt of his nails across his nipples. His skin flushes as he lets out a high whine, putting pressure on the glans of his cock.

His long fingers wrapped around his flesh, his tip flushed with color as he thrusts in and out of his vice grip. 

His mind's fuzzy, as he steps closer to the edge…his stomach flutters with impossible heat.

"Derek…" Spencer can't help that a cry escapes his mouth; his mind muzzy with arousal.

He wishes it was something more than a passing fantasy; that it was Derek pressed along his back, knocking Spencer's hand away and working his length instead. 

A man can dream, right?

His breath harshly mixing with the spray of water as his grip tightens and speeds up. Not much longer now. 

"You alright in there Kid?"

Spencer barely registers the deep growl of a voice; the draft as the bathroom door opens. His toes curl as he twists his grip. His knees wobble. 

Spencer presses his hand to the glass- head bowed; trying to steady himself under the intense pleasure. Couldn't stop if he tried. 

Flicking his thumb over the head one more time- he comes. Cum splatters against the glass door- chased down the drain with suds and water.

"Derek…" He pants, body trembling as he tries to steady himself against the shower wall.

He focuses enough to see the silhouette through the shower's glass door. His heart runs cold.

Derek stands there, stock still- mouth a shocked "o"- trying to make sense of what he's witnessed.


	2. Chapter 2

He doesn't know how long it is before the water goes cold.

He feels like throwing himself to the floor, kicking and screaming at the injustice of it all. He stares at the unmoving shape behind the glass- like a Manet sunrise; etches and blurs of colors.

Spencer shivers as he reaches to turn off the frigid water- teeth chattering. The figure finally moves, edging its way out of the bathroom- the door clicks shut behind it.

Spencer's hand trembles as he fumbles with the glass door as it slides back. He grasps for a towel with numb fingers.

His body tight with shame; he towels off slowly, punishing himself with the stiff blasts of cold air from the hotel's room.

The slithering silence wraps its body around Spencer's chest that much tighter- making it impossible to find breathe again.

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

"Derek!" Spencer cried. Derek muscles tightened- the sound of the shower thunderous in his own ears.

The way Spencer called for Derek sounded off…you could never be too sure with Reid. 

"Kid, everything alright?" Derek stilled as he heard Spencer's breathing hitch.

Curiosity got the better of him as he pushed the door open.

Steam furled around his head; his mouth went dry at the sight—shadow of a hand stroking furiously; head bowed and his name lingering on the other man's lips.

There are a thousand other Derek's. Spencer didn't...

His feet remained rooted as Spencer pressed his hand against the glass- head bowed, panting mixed with the splash of water off the tiled wall.

Move-this is private…Derek thought. 

Spencer's moans go higher, rougher as he fucks into his fist. 

"Derek…" Spencer sobbed- body trembling as his hips snap again and again. 

Derek's eyes went impossibly wide as Spencer's hand stilled- white streaks of cum splattering against the shower door.

Derek stares at the Spencer shaped blur resting against the door, trying to catch his breath.

Head tilted—"Derek?"

Panic bubbles up—

Bursting—Morgan can't move. 

He stared open mouthed at what he's witnessed.

He didn't know how many seconds- minutes had passed before Spencer hissed- jerking away from the spray, fumbling to shut it off.

Derek swallowed- trying to collect his scrambled thoughts. He eased out of the bathroom, images playing like mad in his mind.


	3. Chapter 3

Spencer dresses quickly- trying to tamp down the heat and shame withering in his gut.

His heart hammers in his temples as he collects his dirty clothing.

He didn't mean…it was to relive stress…and Derek kinda creeps…sometimes...into his fantasies…it kinda just…slipped…

His face heat at the memory; gathering the bundle of dirty things under his arm, he turns the door handle cautiously, slowly easing himself out of the bathroom.

His heart drops- the hotel's room is empty,Derek packed and downstairs with the team. 

Spencer sighs with a mixture of relief and nervousness. He folds the dirty laundry, placing them into the bottom of his go bag.

*Derek should have knocked first* Spencer thinks ruefully- he finishes packing his things. The team's expected at the airport to catch the Red eye back to Virginia.

Back home- Spencer's hands tremble as he gathers his things.

He wishes he was more careful. He wishes…he wishes he could take it back. Make it go away.

He feels hollow as he checks the room one more time before leaving- hitching his bags over his shoulder- he shuts the door behind him. 

0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

Derek scrubs his hand across his shaved head.

Every time he closes his eyes…he sees Spencer's lithe frame…hand flying over skin…the glass…the fucking sound...his name.

It's all too much.

Why couldn't Spencer be normal and wait until they were…off work.

*No, that's unfair of me to even think that.* Morgan chastises himself.

*But still- come on, Man. Why me?*

Morgan closes his eyes, shaking his head- as if that would chase the dialogue from his head. The feelings that Spencer stirred in him.

He doesn't know if he should be flattered or creeped out...they're best friends after all!

*Maybe there's some other Derek…*

Yeah right.

"Everything alright?" Em gives Derek a light poke in the shoulder- Derek shivers as he's shaken from his thoughts. His hard on finally deflates to a chub. 

"Yeah, just…tired." He yawns… 

His body is tired. Mind too.

*I should have left when I saw him…*

Morgan bites his lip- the images floating around in his mind.

"Where's Spence?" J.J comes up to the other two, packed and ready to go. Hotch and Rossi stand near the hotel's entrance…slumped against two couches.

"He should be coming in a second…" Derek stares at the floor as he says this…guilt washing over him.

Spencer comes in a rush- catching Derek gaze. Spencer flinches- looking away quickly. Derek's face burns.

He shuts his eyes…feeling the curious stare of Prentiss and J.J.

They're ready to go.


	4. Chapter 4

Spencer jabs the elevator's button, the cab not moving fast enough for his liking. He sighs, going for the stairs instead.

He has an urge to drown his sorrows in a tub of cookie dough ice cream- that or drop a radio in a bath with him in it…

Well, it's not that bad…really.

Spencer laughs bitterly- this has to blow over eventually.

He trudges as he hits the fourth floor, presses the door open, his bags weigh him down like rocks. He struggles to find breath as tears scratch at the corner of his eyes- heart butting at his ribcage.

He fumbles his way down the hall, his limbs sagging and tired with the strain of keeping it together.

How can he fix this if he can't even look Derek in the eye.

He grits his teeth as he makes it to his apartment door- fingers trembling he wraps them around his keys, letting the metal dig into his skin.

He manages to unlock the door- dropping his things at the threshold, the heavy door swings back- the automatic lock sounding thunderous in the silence and dark that surrounds Reid.

He leans against the wall, not even bothering with the lights. His frame shakes as a shuddering sob bubbles up- tears falling faster still. Reid pulls in a sharp breath— a scream bubbling up; tearing him at the seams.

How is he ever going to get them back to before…

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0

Derek drives around for hours it seems; mind buzzing so loud.

If he grabs a beer—he knows one won't be enough…he won't stop until he's wrecked. But if he doesn't stop thinking about the sounds…what dust it stirred up within him. He won't forget the moans and grunts- the slaps and splatter.

What it did to him…

His name…

Derek's fingers curl around the steering wheel in a white-knuckled grip.

He won't stop the thinking about how he wants to press one beautiful Pretty Boy against a bookshelf and kiss him until his lips are bruised and swollen—how he wants to skate a finger along each one of his ribs…kissing and nipping his way down…

Derek's face is red with…shame? Confusion?

A moan escaped his lips- he swallows hard as he realizes where he was headed all along.

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

Spencer finally pushes himself off the floor—hanging up his scarf and coat properly. The laundry can wait 'til tomorrow.

Spencer closes his eyes and it feels as though the room's spinning. His body aches with the need to relax.

A bath- he's going to take a bath…maybe relax?

The firm knocks at the door scatters that thought to shit.

Spencer flinches at the sound. Maybe if he's really quiet…

"Reid? I need to talk to you." Derek rumbles.

He'll go away.

"I'm not leaving until you open the door." 

Spencer can imagine the defiant look on Derek's face.

Reid sighs, staring at the door.

"You do know I still have the key you gave me…" Derek threatens.

Really? Remember to get that back from him when you can form a coherent sentence around him again- Spencer thinks as he opens the door.

"What do you want?" Spencer's voice breaks as he stares at Derek's shoulder.

"Can I come in?" 

Spencer's gaze flicks to Derek's face, his own reddening.

Spencer steps aside and Derek breezes past him.

"You haven't unpacked yet?" Derek tries; the air stiflingly awkward between them.

Spencer pointedly ignores him, wrapping his arms around himself in comfort.

"Why are you here?" Spencer whispers. Derek's mouth twitches.

"Why me?" Derek focuses on Reid. Spencer's heart goes shockingly cold. "I can't wrap my head around it. Why me? My name?" Derek growls.

Spencer bites his lip- words dying in his throat. His jaw clenches as he stares at the floor. His stomach churns in embarrassment and anger.

"Give me an answer- how in the hell can you do that? I mean that was disgus-"

Spencer jerks his head, eyes narrowing at Derek's accusation.

"Why did you stand there? I pretty sure most people would excuse themselves if they walked in on someone masturbating- or am I so far behind in societal norms that I'm just…" Reid shuts his eyes, blood roaring in his ears. "I'm sorry- I can't… I can't and do not want to explain myself to you, but you should have walked away- that was something private and you…" Spencer's face is bright red, hands trembling as he balls them into fists.

Derek wants to turn around, take it all back if he could…but his stubbornness; his pride won't let him drop it.

"But-"

"Morgan, I think it's time for you to leave." Spencer's voice is deadly calm as his quivering hand points toward the door.

Derek narrows his eyes. Spencer grits his teeth, pulse point jumping in his throat.

"GET OUT OF MY APARTMENT!" Spencer seethes, all about ready to push Derek out. Derek tenses, shoulders squaring.

Derek's head swirls with confusion-how did they get here?

He stomps out, Spencer staring after him. Spencer's chest is ready to explode as his heart chips away at his brave armor.

The door clicks shut, the lock sounding thunderous in the quiet apartment.

That bath sounds pretty good right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think.


	5. Chapter 5

Derek stares at the ceiling, trying to figure out what this knot of emotions mean. All too quickly minutes slip by until slivers of light peak through his bedroom curtains.

And still, he has no answers.

And so he pulls himself out of bed.

And he gets ready for work.

And he knows today is going to be awkward as hell.

And he tries to think of what he's going to do or say when he sees Spencer.

And in the back of his mind he realizes that he was sorta a total ass to his best friend.

And he wonders if Spencer still considers him a friend anymore as he drives to work.

And he wonders why that fact means so much to him- if Reid's his friend or not- as he pulls into a parking space.

And he tries to fight this nervous feeling in his gut as he pushes the button for the elevator.

And when he looks at the metal doors- even though they distort his image, he still knows he looks like crap.

And then the elevator comes and he gets on…and rides it to the office.

And then the door dings and his stomach burns-he thinks about throwing some stat his way about ulcers.

And…and his thoughts scatter to crap as Spencer looks up from his desk as the elevators doors slide open, and how his eyes go hard and icy.

And he thinks- Spencer should never have that look on his face…I put that there.

And Derek scowls back- because that's what he's supposed to do. That's the masculine thing…macho, manly…full of utter bullshit.

And he gets angry at himself for being angry at Spencer…and angry at Reid for making him angry at himself….

And he goes straight to the kitchenette, not really feeling up to talking to anyone.

And he distinctly hears Garcia squeak in protest at his obvious slight.

And he curses under his breathe because he knows she's gonna dig.

And he's so scared of what he himself is going to find.

And he realizes that at this point he really doesn't care.


	6. Chapter 6

Garcia stares open mouthed as Morgan burns a trail to the kitchenette.

"Did he just…" She looks over at Reid whose eyes are hardened stones.

"What's going on?" Garcia asks. 

Spencer scowls- mind numb at Derek's blatant rudeness. Spencer knows Derek is upset right now; hell, Spencer is too. 

But to just-

"I did something that wasn't socially acceptable, Morgan's pissed and an ass. Anything else you want to know?" Spencer grinds out.

Never more has he wanted to slap some sense into Derek, shake him until he wakes up- it was a mistake for ever loving sakes!

Garcia frowns, "I'm gonna go talk to him. "

"I can't bring myself to care anymore." Spencer dismisses the subject entirely, staring at his coffee mug, watching the steam spiral and dissipate into nothing.

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

Derek wants to hit something so bad it freakin' hurts.

He lets out a shuddering breath as he grips the granite countertop.

No matter how hard he tries he can't—it won't go away.

He just wants it to go away- but the thoughts linger…remembering…

Spencer…

Carl. 

*I'm a man. A man isn't effected by his best friend. I'm not gay.*

 

The images and feelings mix in his mind until they blur. He doesn't know how to separate the two.

* Its okay to be gay. To love Reid. Its okay. *

There's a small knock on the door.

"Der-Bear?" Garcia's face pulled into a mask of hurt. "What's going on?"

Derek clenches his teeth. 

He does not want to talk about this- not now…not ever.

"Garcia, I don't think this is the right"—

"Look at me." Garcia demands; it's jarring that their usual banter is gone.

Derek slowly levels his gaze at her, jaw clenching.

"Spencer's clearly upset…so are you. What happened?" Her voice is calm as she takes a step towards him.

If she touches him, he'd surely break- she has to see that.

"Baby Girl, it's nothing…I was just…I was an ass last night- just give me time to fix it." Derek wants to turn away from all of this- but he knows that if he can't deal now, everything's going to fester until it gets toxic.

"Derek?" Garcia knows if she holds out long enough, he will spill.

Derek scrubs his hand over his face; the world seems to collapse on top of him. This is so unfair…

"If Carl..." He swallows hard, bile rising fast. "If Carl never…did what he did…would I be different?" He looks up to find a confused look on his friends face.

"If he never molested you?" Garcia's voice barely breaks a whisper. Derek shuts his eyes tight at the words.

But at least they're out there.

At least they're being said.

Derek nods slowly, willing himself not to cry.

"If…if he never molested me…would I be okay with myself? Accepting…" Derek's voice breaks- stubbornness setting into his bones.

"It's not fair! I don't get to choose. I don't get to discover this for myself…I see Reid…I see Carl…and what he did! Fuck!" He slams his fist against the wooden doors on the cabinets, the doors jumping off their hinges before settling again.

Garcia's eyes skate over Derek's sobbing, frame quivering under the force and pressure.

She wraps her arms around him; he buries his face into her shoulder- the scent of jasmine enveloping him.

"Shh… It's okay." She murmurs over and over as he lets go.

Garcia turns as the door opens- Rossi stopping midstride; mouth open, he turns and leaves as quickly as he came.

She runs a hand up and down his back- after a moment he stills, sniffling. She reaches grabbing the Kleenex off the table, handing him a couple.

He cleans his face, letting out a tired breath. He doesn't have the energy to even feel embarrassed.

He looks up at Garcia- grateful to see an accepting face.

"I...on the last case Reid and I shared a hotel room, like always…" Derek starts off shakily. "And I walked in on something private." Derek shakes his head as his face heats. Garcia's face does not change…he keeps going.

"And I should have walked out as soon as…but I didn't…and he said my…" Derek shuts his eyes, clenching his teeth again. "Reid said something...And I can't get it out of my head…and I went over his apartment when we got home…and I just wanted to sort everything out but I screwed up and said what he did was…Garci, I screwed up." Derek shoulders slump.

Garcia quirks a brow.

"I called it disgusting. Not him…just him calling my name...but I'm the one who shoulda walked away… and I was a jerk this morning and I don't know how I can take it back." Morgan finishes, voice strained with exasperation.

"Do you have feelings for Reid?" Garcia asks tentatively.

"Yeah…that's the prob"—

"Do you want to fix this?"

"Of course, but"—

"Tell him what you told me."

"But-"

"Don't let Carl make you a victim again."

"But-"

"Trust me, he needs to know. I think it'd make both of you feel better if you actually sat down and had an honest conversation." She nudges his shoulder making them both smile.

"Alright"—

Garcia gives him a look.

"I promise- if he's still talking to me that is." Derek gives a concerned look.

"Oh, I'm pretty sure he'll listen." Garcia gives a knowing smile.


	7. Chapter 7

Spencer's gaze automatically follows Derek as he comes from the kitchenette; eyes puffy and red.

Concern twitches in Spencer's chest, but then the feeling of Derek shooting daggers earlier that morning shut him down.

Spencer grits his teeth- gears turning in his skull.

Prentiss stares at the both of them- a joke dying on her tongue.

Reid shivers- the silence thick between them all.

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

The words seem to blur in front of Derek eyes; his fingers and wrist stiff as he flexes them. He shakes his head trying to clear the fog from his mind.

He looks at the stack beside him and mentally curses himself.

So. Many. Sick. Fucks.

Spencer flips open another file; fingers scrawling over the page—

Derek can't help but laugh; one file left.

Spencer's head jerks in Derek's direction, hazel eyes piercing; it's quitting time.

"Hey Kid...need a ride home?" Derek starts putting the remaining files in his bag. 

Spencer purses his lips, eyes flicking from his desk to Derek's face. 

Damn the kid can hold a grudge.

Spencer sighs, closing his last file. Derek finishes packing his bag, grabbing his leather jacket off the back of his chair.

"No, I'm fine." Spencer grits out.

"Kid-"

"Just drop it Morgan!" Spencer hisses, eyes blurry. 

Why does everything have to be so complicated?

"Reid-I just wanted to talk to you. I- I fucked up, okay?" Derek's voice low, hurt. " I just want to make things right. "

Spencer's breath hitches.  
He shouldn't...

"Alright…" Spencer says quietly, sticking the files in his top drawer.

It feels as if he can't get any air as Derek moves near him. He quickly puts on his coat, his hands shake as he places the rest of his things in his messenger bag—slinging it over his shoulder.

"'m ready." Spencer stares at Derek's shoulder.

Derek's reaches out—he never realized how much he touches Spencer. His hand aches to rest on his shoulder- a pat on the back- fingers mussing Spencer's hair…

Derek curses himself for the awkwardness…it's not supposed to be like this.

"Alright Kid, let's go." Derek frowns a little as his hand drops back, instead looping his fingers in his belt holes—something to fill the void.

/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/0/

Spencer's knuckles are cold against the window- water droplets flinging themselves from the side view mirrors.

Objects are closer than they appear…

The silence wraps around them- Spencer's head muzzy with so many thoughts, he doesn't know how to begin.

Derek grips the steering wheel, the road slick and black. The moon's nothing more than a thumb nail hanging on for dear life.

How did they get here?

Spencer shuts his eyes, trying to calm his erratic heart that slams double-time in its cage.

And then that thought comes surging back. That thought that's been haunting him for the past two days…

I said Morgan's name…

So stupid. 

Why?

Spencer's skin is tight as he tries to wrap his head around it.

The car slips through traffic lights; stopping and going—the night belongs to them.

Spencer feels as if he could scream, and scream and scream until his mind gives. He said Derek's name…because he wants him.

He wants someone that is off limits. 

Unavailable. A best friend. A brother. A man. A man who is so not gay.

Spencer's startled as a frustrated sigh escapes his own lips. Derek's brow furrows in concern and confusion as he looks over at Spencer .

Spencer shakes his head as Derek raises a brow- everything alright?

Even when they're at odds- there's this understanding, this connection between them.  
That has to count for something, right?

All Spencer knows is that- something's got to give, or they're both going to crack.


	8. Chapter 8

Derek's legs feel like lead as he follows behind Reid up the four flights of stairs. 

One look at the elevator brought back the six elevator related deaths per year stat that the wonderful genius had dropped so many years earlier.

Derek does pay attention.

 

Spencer makes it to his door, trying to remain calm as he feels the heat from Derek's body.

It's not like we haven't been close before* Spencer berates himself as he fumbles with the keys to unlock the door. 

His stomach clenches as the door opens, Morgan hanging back as if he'd bolt as soon as he got the chance.

Derek shakes his head- you're here to tell him. It'd make everything a lot easier and you know it.

Spencwe places his bag on the coat hook, and as he shrugs his jacket off, fingertips brush his shoulders. Spencer shivers when he realizes it's Derek divesting him of his jacket; movements calm and gentle. Spencer's face heats with blush—his heart fluttering against pulse points. Derek turns to hang up Spencer's jacket alongside his, small smile splaying on his lips.

"D-do you want some coffee?" Spencer asks quietly- body thrumming with energy he doesn't know what to do with.

"So I can be up all night scaling walls?" Derek's mouth pulls into a grin; it's infectious, Spencer smiles as well.

"Yeah, I can take a cup."Derek agrees. Spencer nods, tilting his head- *follow me*.  
Derek ambles into the kitchen behind Spencer. Spencer busies himself with the pot and grains. Derek settles himself on a stool in Spencer's kitchen; watching him as he fills the pot with water- measures out the coffee grains…

"Thank you." Derek whispers as Spencer turns, placing a cup, spoon and napkin in front of him.

"No problem." Spencer says.

They sit in silence, trying to gather their thoughts as the coffee maker whirs and drips…sputtering to a stop after a while.

"I got it." Derek gets up-grabbing the pot and pours them both a mug full. Spencer takes the canister of sugar from the table and starts pouring. Once they're settled again, they remain in silence- sipping coffee.

"I"- Derek clears his throat, body tensing with anxiousness. It's now or never. " I wanted to apologize Reid. I didn't mean to upset you the other night. Every thing came out wrong, and it all went to hell; and this morning wasn't any better. I'm sorry." Derek stares down into the inky pit of coffee in front of him.

Spencer nods, face set as he clinks his spoon against the rim of the mug, stirring the liquid again.

"It's alright- I just…" Spencer shuts his eyes. I don't want to do this…I don't want to be here. I…

"I wish none of this ever happened." Spencer says quietly. Derek makes a small noise—Spencer can't tell if it's in agreement or not.

"Look, I shouldn't have hung around listening to something that was private…I just got…I got stuck and I couldn't…"Derek fumbles out of frustration. "It shocked me— it brought back some stuff I thought I buried." Derek scrubs his hand over his eyes.

"I'm sorry." Spencer stares at his hands.

"I over reacted though." Derek whispers.

"No, you didn't. I any sane person would react the same way if they witnessed their coworker um…jacking off and saying their name…" Spencer's face is scarlet as he shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He shuts his eyes as the heat of Derek's gaze hits his face.

Derek doesn't know how to tell him that part of his problem is that somehow Spencer found his way into his thoughts as he was taking care of himself in the shower before work. That hasn't sat right with him all day.

"Pretty Boy-"Derek's voice breathless as he searches for the words… "I wasn't knocking the wanking thing…I mean it was a tough case- you were relieving stress. My name…so what... I'm pretty sure we've all fantasized about some weird shit…I just…when I reacting, I thought about what feelings it stirred up within me, and how…if Carl hadn't done what he done"—Derek grits, fingers clenching around the handle of his mug. Spencer's eyes go wide as saucers. 

"Oh come on Pretty Boy- don't look at me like that." Derek sighs. Spencer's eyes get shiny.

"I'm not"—Derek's breathe stutters. 

"I'm not that little kid anymore, I can take care of myself. I can't let what he did ruin what I want. Carl can't hurt me anymore, I won't let him. I can't…" Derek stops, looking down at the trembling pale hand that has found their way to his warm hands.

"I realized three things. One, I can be a total ass when it comes down to it." Derek says; Spencer sniffles as a small laugh leaks out. 

"Two, I really didn't have a problem with what went down in the hotel. Three, I was so worked up because I couldn't admit it to myself…"

Spencer's brow furrows at the last thought.

"What?" Derek mirrors Spencer's expression.

"Admit what?" Spencer doesn't want to breathe.

"When I took care of myself in the shower this morning thinkin' about you- it pissed me off cuz I could have joined you in the hotel if I woulda saw it sooner." Derek doubles over in laughter as Spencer sputters.

Spencer eyes narrow. "Tell me you're joking."

"Now," Derek composes himself, leaning across the table until he's nose to nose with Spencer. "Why would I ever do such a thing?"

Spencer stares, eyes flicking from Derek's eyes to how close his lips are to his- the smell of coffee and sugar invading his senses.

"Alright?" Derek's hand cups the side of Spencer's face; the rough pad of his thumb raking across sensitive skin, leaving a trail of goose bumps in its wake. Spencer's eyes flutter shut as he nods, licking his lips.

Derek leans in, mouth capturing Spencer's in a tentative kiss. He shivers as Spencer moans. Spencer parts his lips, inviting Derek to deepen the kiss Fire rakes across their skin as Derek moans, kisses deep- bruising. His fingers rake through Spencer's hair, loving the silky texture there.

Spencer whimpers as Derek pulls back. Derek tries to catch his breath. He tugs Spencer around the table—Spencer trembling with want. 

"Pretty Boy"- Derek's voice is filled with wonder as he stares at Spencer in awe. Spencer straddles Derek's lap, attaching his mouth to his again. Spencer grunts as a large warm hand grips his hip, the other skates under his dress shirt to find silky soft skin.

"Mmhh…" Derek sighs as Spencer rolls his hips against him, fingers lacing behind his neck.

Spencer grinds back and forth- hardness growing in the front of his pants. He mewls as Derek presses up with an answering erection growing. Their breathing is harsh in the quiet space…

Spencer's toes curl as the pleasure mounts higher and higher…

"Pretty boy…" Derek pants as he breaks away, resting his head in the crook of Spencer's shoulder.

"Mhh?" Spencer's hips never stopped moving. Derek's breath hitches…

"Unless you want me to come in my pants like a horny teenager we need to go to bed. Can I take you to bed?" Derek whispers against Spencer ear, making them both tremor.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not the best at smut... but hopefully you guys enjoy. Let me know what you guys think. Thank you for everything.

Spencer lets his head rest on Derek's shoulder, warm breath puffing against Derek's collar. He whines as Derek holds Spencer's hips still-- hands splayed on his flushed skin.

His heart hammers away as Derek's fingers skate over Spencer's spine. 

Spencer wants to calm down enough to get off Derek without coming.

"Derek…" Spencer breathes as he stands on shaking legs. He bites his lips as the seam of his zipper presses against the material of his boxers- the friction.

Spencer wants to clamp his legs together as he stands, arousal thrumming through his veins.

Derek licks his lips as he takes in the sight of Spencer; hair disheveled, shirt rucked up, lips bruise-red and slick—

"Pretty Boy," Derek whispers.

Come on.

Spencer tugs at Derek until he stands, surging forward until he's pressed the length of Spencer, kissing him hard.

"Want this." Derek mumbles against Spencer's parted lips. Spencer hums in agreement, kissing Derek back. 

They don't lose contact as they shuffle towards Spencer's bedroom—Spencer laughs as he feels Morgan's erection nudging his thigh.

"Funny?" Derek growls, pressing Spencer against the bookcase in the living room; slides his hands over Spencer's wrist, pinning them above his head until he can't move. 

Spencer stares Derek in the eye, challenging him. Morgan presses their groins together, slipping his thigh between Spencer's . Reid's head falls back as if a marionette has lost its final string.

Derek scrapes his teeth against Spencer's exposed skin- grazing against his pulsing carotid. Spencer grinds his hips, smirking as Derek's breath becomes shallow and heavier.

"Bedroom." Spencer demands as Derek's eyes slip close on the delicious torture; breath ghosting over Spencer's jaw.

Derek concedes, tugging Spencer away from the bookshelf and steers him to his room.

His eyes flick up to see the room; and it's everything that he'd imagined it would be- earthy and dark.

Spencer kisses Derek as he pushes his shirt up and off. His hands automatically travel the expanse of Derek's chest, the blunt of his nails scraping across Derek's nipples.  
Derek takes in a deep breath, biting his lip as he stares at Spencer . Spencer draws invisible patterns in Derek's skin; eyes wide with want.

"Spence," Derek whispers and Spencer looks up; a shy smile blooms on the younger man's lips, "I wanna see you too."

Spencer nods; Derek reaches up and undoes each hard, round, pearly white button on Spencer's dress shirt, sliding it off his shoulders. Spencer shivers at the heat of Derek's hands burning against his skin. The shirt finds its way to the floor; Derek plants a kiss on his cheek, delighting in the blush that trails down his body.

Spencer tugs on Derek's belt- undoing the notch and sliding the leather from the buckle- the metal tinkling as Spencer's move the pieces aside. Derek's breathe hitches as a trembling hand undoes the button- the hiss of his zipper bottoming out.

Spencer's eyes burn with fierce concentration on taking Derek pants off- a breathless noise escapes Derek lips as Spencer places his hands on his hips, fingering the exposed skin there.

Derek swears that he sees the cogs and gears working behind Spencer's eyes as his hands make their way back to Derek's jeans- he tugs until the material gives, falling off Derek's hips and pooling at his feet. Derek steps out of them, kicking them off to the side. Spencer presses his fingertips against the skin above his boxer's waistband.

"No fair." Derek pouts, gesturing to Spencer's clothed state. 

"Go ahead." Spencer's voice ghosts- face hot as Derek hums, undoing Spencer's belt and button as well. Doesn't stop until Spencer's left standing in his boxers and mismatched socks.

Spencer kisses Derek softly; Derek tugs Spencer until their hips fit together- puzzle pieces. His hand snakes to the back of Derek's head, fingertips loving the roughness of Derek's stubble scraping against his skin. Derek moans, cupping Reid's jaw.

"Bed." Derek whispers into Spencer's skin- heat pooling in both their guts as Spencer slides a thigh between Derek's; their cocks nudging each other through cloth.

Derek walks them back until Spencer's legs hit the base of the bed. Spencer pushes Derek back a little to hook his thumbs in the waistband of his own shorts- erection tenting the material. Spencer gives a impish grin as Derek's eyes go wide, he inches his boxers down. Spencer's gaze is burning as he catches Derek's eye.

"You know you're a tease, right?" Derek croaks; Spencer laughs. 

"I know." He pulls them down further- a light brown nest of fine hair appears. He arches his brows as Derek licks his lips. Derek makes a small noise as Spencer tugs once more- and the offending garment pools at his feet. Spencer body tremor as Derek takes in the sight of him.

"You're beautiful, you gotta know that." Derek's voice is tight as Spencer blushes- flush running down his torso.

"Thank you." Spencer says. Derekw takes a step forward but Spencer puts a hand on his chest, staying him.

"Take them off first." Spencer says, pointing at Derek's boxers.

Derek wastes no time, the boxers come off in one swoop and he kicks them in the direction of his jeans. Spencer laughs at Derek's quick work.

"I hope you're not laughing at me Spencer Reid."

Spencer laugh turns to a gasp as Derek eases him to the bed- straddling his hips. Derek places his mouth over Spencer's - swallowing his soft sounds of pleasure.

"Is it okay?" Derek asks- Spencer nods as Derek lowers his body onto his skin; heat spreads between the both of them. Derek shivers as their cocks touch- he can feel their pulse beating. His eyes close as Spencer rocks into the heat- slick members glide over each other. Derek digs his nails into the sheets above Spencer head.

"So good…" Derek pants as Spencer thrust up again. He reaches a hand between them; slender fingers wrap around both their heads and squeezes gently. Derek grunts, leaning in to nip at Spencer's neck.

Spencer lets go, sliding his hands to Derek's back side, griping the globes of his ass . He turns his head until his mouth grazes Derek's ear.

"I want you inside me." Spencer's voice barely audible. He loves the way Derek's body tremors under his touch; loves the way Derek's eyes take this dark glint. No finer words have been spoken.

"Condom? Lube?" Derek asks. Spencer flails at the drawer on their right. Derek takes the hint and reaches; fingers looping the handle, he tugs it open- scraping across the bottom he finds the lube, condoms, and…

He chuckles-"Do I even want to know?"

"What? I'm a healthy adult male…I do have a sex drive too…toys are just a"—Morgan cuts Reid off with a kiss. Reid runs his tongue along Morgan's bottom lip.

"Hope I can measure up to that." Derek arches a brow. He pushes Spencer off to kneel on the bed. He reaches between Spencer's legs, fingers twitching against Spencer's thigh.

"Pretty sure you'll be even better- is that what you want to h-hear?" Spencer stammers as Derek slicks up his index finger, rubbing against Reid's opening.

"Was that sarcasm, Dr. Reid?" Derek teases as he puts pressure on Spencer hole.

"Derek-"Spencer voice quivering- Derek smirks at Spencer impersonation of Jell-O. He presses- the tip of his finger breeching Spencer. Spencer eyes flutter close, chest rises and falls. Derek pulls out, slicks up and goes again…deeper.

Spencer winces at the burn- it never exactly goes away- but he knows it's worth the pleasure.

"Derek- please…" Spencer breathe a slight whine as Derek slowly adds another finger- loving the way Spencer squirms- flush traveling the expanse of his body.

"Almost done Pretty Boy"- Derek breathes as Spencer grinds himself down on the third finger. Derek pulls his fingers half way out and curls them- looking for…

"Shiitake Mushrooms!" Spencer turns his head; gripping the closest pillow to his mouth he muffles a high whine. Derek's dick feels like a fortune stick- painfully hard with that sound. Spencer pants, body slick with sweat- a small amount of pre-cum pooling on his belly. 

Derek snickers as he presses three fingers in, spreading them as Spencer's muscles clench against him.

"Ready Spence?" Derek's voice is low as he bends, kissing Reid. 

"Yes- P-please, yes…'' Spencer practically sobs as Derek pulls out again- leaning back as he grabs the foiled packet- tearing it with his teeth. He rolls the condom on his cock; Spencer rests on his elbows, eyes wide in appreciation. Derek squirts a generous amount of lube on his palm, working his dick over.

"So ready." Derek bites out as his cock jerks. He grips himself around the base, the other hand on Spencer knee as he guides the tip of his penis to Spencer's entrance.

"Ok?" Derek rubs Spencer's quivering thigh; Spencer moans.

"Please." Spencer whispers and Derek presses forward; he looks down to see Spencer's hole stretch to accommodate his length. He has to stop moving before he comes right on the spot. His muscles tense under the strain as he breathes in deep.

He grits his teeth as he presses forward again, his dick being engulfed by searing heat. Spencer's back arches in pleasure; eyes screwed tightly shut at it all.

Little sparks fly from their skin. Spencer hisses at the slight burn, but he grabs Spencer's thigh, pulling him forward.

Derek presses forward, sinking in to the hilt; puffing as he leans over Spencer. Spencer shivers as Derek kisses his cheek. Spencer runs his hand over Derek's back, the muscles rippling under his hand.

"So beautiful." Derek says as he thrusts his hips. 

Spencer shivers, spreading his legs farther. Derek starts a slow rhythm, caressing Spencer's body on each downward stroke. Spencer stares up at Derek, eyes pleading him to go harder…faster…deeper.

"Derek-" Spencer pants as Derek slips a hand to Spencer's hip- pressing him harder into the mattress.

The air is thick with the soft words slipping between their lips- silent kisses- the sticky slap of skin against skin. 

Spencer digs his heels into Derek's backside as he works to meet Derek's powerful thrusts. Spencer nails dig into Derek's biceps- little flicks of pain enhancing the pleasure skating over Derek's skin. 

Derek loves the sighs…the whimpers and curses that he draws from the lithe frame under him. 

His Pretty Boy… his. He's going to make Spencer Reid his.

"Fuck!" Spencer cries as Derek does something with his hips and his tongue and his body is on flame as Derek thrusts harder and the squeaking frame of the bed mixes with the knock of the thumping of the headboard and the plaintive cries from the springs in the mattress and there's so much to feel and hear and it's all mixing together with the quiet I love you's and I want this forever and please- just a little more just a little more and I think…I think—

"I'm there- so there- fuck Derek-I love you so much" Spencer's voice quivers as their hips stutter, hearts slamming against emptying skulls. Spencer tenses around Derek's cock and it's over…dick jerking between them…cum spills from Spencer.

"Oh-Ohh!" Morgan's breathless as his voice cracks- he pressed his head in the hollow of Reid's neck as he comes inside Reid. He shivers as the world gets sucked into the center of blackness…and then he washed in white.

Heavy breathes fill the room as heart beats pound behind closed eyelids.

Derek finds the strength to carefully pull out of Spencer. Spencer shivers at the loss-curling on his side. Derek slides off the condom, tying it and dropping it in the bin next to Spencer's bed. 

Spencer frowns as the cum splattered on his torso; he swipes at it with his bed sheets, limbs too heavy move any more than that. Derek wraps his arm around Spencer, pulling him close. Spencer nuzzles into the crook of Derek's neck. Derek lets his hand rest on Spencer's chest, feeling his heart slow.

"Derek?" Spencer mumbles, voice heavy.

"Yeah, Pretty Boy?" Derek runs his fingers through Spencer sweat-rumpled locks. His heart hammers double time in the realization that he doesn't have the urge to run. He tilts Spencer's head, kissing him softly. Spencer hums, shivering. Derek pulls the comforter over them both; Spencer rearranges them until he's lying against Derek, head resting on his chest.

"You're staying, right?" Spencer yawns, blinking; trying to stay awake. 

"I'm not going anywhere." Derek relishes the warmth of Spencer's body--he's not far off himself.

"Good." Spencer mutters as they slide into the silky darkness of sleep.


End file.
